My Zsu Zsu watches the Game Show Network late at night. She says it helps her get to sleep but truthfully, I don’t see how that’s possible. There is something mesmerizing about game shows that some Madison Avenue flunkie figured out nearly 60 years ago, almost like watching a bad skin flick but without the “redeeming social value.”

If you get a chance, you simply must watch some of the ancient and honorable game shows from the 1950’s that are rebroadcast on GSN after midnight. Beat the Clock is one of my favorites. Ordinary New York (or occasionally New Jersey) couples are forced to accomplish the most challenging but unremarkable tasks in so many seconds. There’s just something riveting about watching a man trying to deflect ping pong balls into a small pail with his hands tied behind him by thrusting his stomach into the path of the balls thrown by his wife. Or a woman catching marbles in her mouth thrown by her husband, knee walking across the studio floor, and having to spit them into a paper cup (no Styrofoam back then).

This was one of the highest rated prime time shows of its day.

Without a doubt, however, the greatest game show ever invented was What’s My Line? The half hour show was a mainstay on network television for 17 years and featured panelists who had to guess the occupation of ordinary people by asking a series of questions that could only be answered “yes” or “no.” The panel featured the lovely actress Arlene Francis, Broadway columnist for the old New York Post Dorothy Killgallen, and one of the founding editors of Random House Bennet Cerf. The banter by the panel was witty and literate – almost like a televised Algonquin Round Table while some of the occupations they had to guess were hilarious. For example, a “lumber herder” shepherded logs from streams and lakes in the north woods and directed them to the shore where trucks would take the to the mill.

But the highlight of every show was a “Mystery Guest” where the panelists would have to put on these ridiculously huge black blindfolds so they couldn’t see the celebrity sitting with the host. The mystery guest would try everything to trick the panelists. Men would use falsetto voices to try and make the panelists believe they were a woman and so forth.

At any rate, what got me thinking about the show was this recent flap about the Mohammed caricatures and how the Islamic fanatics are using it to force a clash of civilizations with a west. Can you imagine an episode of What’s my Line that would feature one of these suicidal jihadists as a Mystery Guest pitted against the witty, urbane, liberal panelists? Imagine some of the questions:

Is your line of work considered dangerous?
Do you have to wear any special equipment to do your job?
Is this something I could do with the proper training?

I’m sure you could come up with your own questions. The point being, the panelists could ask a hundred questions and still not be able to guess our jihadist’s occupation. It is so far beyond our capacity to understand a mind that would consider it a proper response to a mildly offensive cartoon to burn an embassy or behead an infidel that the Mystery Guest may as well be from another planet. At bottom, that is what this “Cartoon Intifada” is all about. While the controversy is being driven by men who know exactly what they’re doing, the poor schmucks who are held in thrall of the holy men’s message don’t have a clue. They have no more idea what freedom of speech means than most of us have of quantum mechanics.

This is a special kind of cluelessness; a closing off of independent thought. And until we get around that and are able to penetrate the wall the separates Muslims from the modern world, there will be many more intifadas with the exact same results.

Stupidity always accompanies evil. Or evil, stupidity.
(Louise Bogan)

Got that right, dog!
(Me)

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Adam Graham has a first class post on the book Prayers for the Assassin by Robert Ferringo in which he takes apart the premise – an Islamic takeover of much of America – in expert fashion. Fascinating read.

Orac weighs in on the Cartoon Caper by responding to an unsolicited email from a Muslim who seems a little peeved. Orac’s sensible response is a lesson to us all.

Jack Cluth has a few choice words for the rioters in the streets of Arabia. Good to see many lefties on the side of the angles on this issue.

Dan Meslon has a thorough, thought provoking look at abortion. He covers every angle – political, legal, and moral – and has some interesting conclusions.

In case you were unaware, there is real momentum building in Washington to look into the case of missing Iraqi WMD’s being sent to Syria and maybe even Iran. Our lovely Carnival Pin-Up girl Pamela has the latest and skewers the Democrats for ignoring the issue.

Two Dogs reprints part of a study showing black spending habits. Wildly politically incorrect but since it was written by a black person, one must take it for what it is – a wake up call that will go unheeded.

Raven returns to the Carnival with a post on the clueless UN and how John Bolton has his hands full even trying some basic reforms – like members showing up on time for Security Council meetings.

Have Alta Vista open in another window because those Pompadoured Pachyderms at Elephants in Academia are blogging a French website that is full of la chauve-souris de la lune.

Van Helsing proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that a leftist, is a leftist no matter what country he’s from.

Is there anyone uglier than Janis Karpinski? Tony B. doesn’t think so. I think he’s right.

Resistence is Futile presents “What the left is thinking.” I thought the post would be much shorter.

AJ Strata is imploring the clueless Democrats to carry through on their threat to run on a platform of impeaching Bush.

The lovely Mensa Barbie puts the Palestinian elections in perspective, calling for a cut off of funds to the murderous terrorists in Hamas. Yes please.

The equally lovely Wonder Woman wonders what the Arabic word for “irony” is when looking at some of the clueless statements from Muslims over the cartoon imbroglio.

Here it is! Your weekly fix of Carnival satire from our stable of excellent writers!

Our favorite hippie chick Peace Moonbeam is in Cuba casting a baleful eye at Gitmo.

Mr. Right has a hilarious series of pictures entitled “The Democrat Family Album.”

Welcome newbie Potfry who writes of the frantic search by Arabs for a Danish flag to burn.

Buckley F. Williams presents “Top 9 Signs Your Religion May Not Be So Peaceful.”

I tried my hand at satire this week with “CRAZED ISLAMISTS TORCH NORSE EMBASSIES: PAYBACK FOR “THE 13TH WARRIOR”

Sixteen Volts brings us “The Wisdom of Feminism.”

Kender has penned some “Songs for the Fatwa.” How about “House of Zarqawi’s Son.”

“Praise undeserved, is satire in disguise”. (Alexander Pope)

Miriam wonders what the difference is between Hamas and Fatah. Not too damn much.

Cao brings to our attention a Mr. Richard Erlich, a journalist who has set out to deliberately lie in order to damage the cause of Jack Idema.

DL at TMH Bacon Bits writes about Cluebat Hall of Famer Jesse Jackson’s impeachment speech. I suspect we’ll be seeing a lot more of these over the next few months.

Jay at Stop the ACLU has the jaw dropper of the day as the so called rights group is defending protesters who desecrate military funerals.

Jeffrey Strain has a smorgasbord of links following cluebats who are clueless about money.

Bill Karl wonders where liberals will go now that Canada has gone to the Tories. Just don’t send them here. We’ve got enough moonbats of our own to worry about, thank you.

Mark Coffey has the skinny on Cluebat Hall of Famer John Kerry and his attempt to lead the troops in an 11th hour filibuster against Alito.