Right Wing Nut House



Filed under: "24" — Rick Moran @ 4:26 am

Originally uploaded by elvenstar522.

All I can say is I’m glad Jack is on our side!

After 5 relatively peaceful hours, Jack Bauer exploded across my 37″ HD TV (with Logitech 5.1 Surround Sound Speakers)in the most exciting 10 minutes of action-packed gore the show has seen in quite a while. So, let’s get right to the weekly feature everyone stops by to see…


Jack: 13 dead, I gratuitous wounding, 1 viscious pistol whipping
Show:76 (32 in train crash)

Jack accounted for 12 (I had to re-run the tape and count again because Jack was dropping ‘em faster than I could keep track.) Heller put down 2 while the Marines accounted for 8.

Lest anyone doubt my numbers, we know there were 16 terrorists inside the warehouse (CTU thermal scan info relayed to Jack by Erin) and 6 terrorists outside. In addition, we know that the American that Audrey saw at the Heritage Club dinner escaped. We also know they didn’t bring back any prisoners to CTU to be interrogated.

Beruzz accounted for the other kill with his creative use of the shovel.


After Jack’s spectacular rescue of Secretary Heller and Audrey we meet Paul, Audrey’s estranged husband. Obviously, Audrey fell in love with the guys British accent because THERE”S NOTHING ELSE ABOUT THE GUY THAT WOULD CAUSE ANY WOMAN TO LOSE ANY SLEEP OVER! What a total zero. He takes the news of Audrey’s desire not to get back together rather well, stiff upper lip and all that. He seems the sort of guy that will fight for Audrey not because he loves her but because he thinks she’s his property.

Two major revelations from the show:

1. Maryann is a mole (duh). Couldn’t they have waited a few weeks, maybe show her pitching in and helping selflessly like Nina in season I? I’m still trying to find my jaw which is still on the floor after season I revelation that Nina was a mole. My guess is that the Islamofascist terrorists are NOT the ones ultimately behind this plot. Whoever Maryann is working for (probably rich white guys) are the villians.

2. The briefcase the terrorists crashed the train to steal contained a super-duper, hi-tech, souped up remote control device that allows one to take control of the atomic pile of any nuclear power plant in the United States. I have only one itsy, bitsy, little question about that…


I mean, it sounds real neat. Sitting at home in front of your TV with a bag of potato chips, some dip, and your Nuclear Power Plant Remote Control Destructo Box. Give me one for Christams next year!

How do you think it works? I mean how in the name of all that is good and holy can it possibly work. There is no science (in this universe anyway) that would allow a remote device to influence in the slightest anything having to do with a nuclear power plant, much less the atomic pile. Even if you were in the same room as the pile, there is nothing that could influence it remotely. It sounds like something Wily E. Coyote would come up with to try and kill the roadrunner.

Oh well…I’ll bite and continue to suspend belief. After all, I watched “The China Syndrome” which was almost as laughable (don’t go there moonbats).


What can you say about Mr. Araz? He acquiesces in the attempted murder of his own son. No choice? He’s certainly committed to the cause.

As for Behruzz, it’s a good thing he’s been in this country 5 years. The way he swung that shovel to kill Tarik before the scumbag could kill him shows that Behruzz picked up a little baseball skill along the way.

And what’s with my hero, Heller? Telling Curtis at CTU that it was okay to torture his own son? I don’t suppose he’s gonna get a father’s day present this year from Richard.


Leaving aside the Buck Rogers Anti-Proton Nuclear Power Plant Dissolvo Ray, anyone else think that the fanatical Islamic warrior that Jack pistol whipped gave up the info on where the Secretary was being held in the warehouse a little too easily? I mean, aren’t these guys ready to die for the cause?

And I was glad to see Secretary Heller was no worse for wear from his hostage experience, but isn’t it convenient that he had an extra suit of clothes to wear after his rescue? When he leaves the warehouse he’s wearing the orange jump suit. Then, in the conference room with Jack and Erin, he’s got a suit on (sans tie).

Maybe he has a closet in his limo.


I watched the episode for the third time with Significant Otherhawk who got back into town from a family trip today and I realized that I had credited Jack with one more kill than he was due. I’ve changed the number for Jack and given our brave Marines credit for another kill.

Jack has killed 13 human beings in 6 hours…how does that guy sleep at night? No wonder he got addicted to heroin last season. (Note: Reminds me of Llyod Bridges in “Airplane“…”I picked a helluva week to stop sniffing glue…”)

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