Right Wing Nut House

1/24/2006

CARNIVAL OF THE CLUELESS #30

Filed under: CARNIVAL OF THE CLUELESS — Rick Moran @ 3:00 pm

This week’s Carnival features some exceptionally clueless clodhoppers from the worlds of politics, entertainment, crime and punishment, and as always, government bureaucracy. And trying to pick one special numbskull for the coveted title “Cluebat of the Week” was really tough, a task as difficult as that faced by the judges at the Golden Globe nominations who obviously let the pressure get to them as they lost their minds and named Brokeback Mountain Best Dramatic Film.

Not only did the judges make a mistake by not putting the film in the proper category (”Film Least Likely to Excite Straight, Heterosexual Males”) but the poor dears also jumped the shark by naming Ang Lee as Best Director. I hope they gave it to him for his work on The Incredible Hulk which was a true date movie and not for Brokeback which was suitable only if you were going out on a date with with the ghost of Liberace or Paula Abdul. With Liberace’s ghost you get certain advantages like only having to buy one popcorn as well being able to hog all the Jujubes. And of course, if you’re with Paula in a dark place, you probably won’t get a chance to watch much of the movie although there are ancillary benefits there as well…like not watching much of the movie.

The usual suspects are well represented this week what with John Kerry, Jimmy Carter, Ted Kennedy, and the Democratic party featured prominently. And we also feature your odd terrorist, rapist, and other bad guys who have displayed not only a cluelessness about being able to tell the difference between good and evil but also a flair for saying the stupidest things when a microphone is thrust in front of their face. Double your pleasure, double your fun.

But this week’s winner is an American albeit a liberal so we can say he’s evil just to piss them off. Actually, he’s not really evil, but clueless? I report - you decide:

George W. Bush’s delivery of the State of the Union address will take place on Tuesday, January 31, a little more than a week from now. It is my strong belief that every single Democrat present in the House chamber for the speech should, at a predetermined moment, stand up and walk out. No yelling. No heated words. Every Democrat should simply stand silently and leave.

Crazy, I know. Crazy, and possibly the best idea ever put before a body of Democrats since the New Deal.

The above comes to us via the blog Truthout that features more loons per square column inch than can be found in a copy of Palmer’s Guide to North American Water Birds. The author, one William Rivers Pitt, isn’t intentionally trying to destroy the Democratic party but his suggestion, published in one of the left’s most read on line publications, would have that effect. For those of us on the right, all we can do is pray that the clueless dems take the Pitts up on his cuckoo idea and act like two year olds who’ve had their blankee taken away from them. The resulting electoral landslide for Republicans later this year may in fact prove to be the best thing that could happen for the left; they may wake up and put grown ups in charge of their party instead of spoiled little kids like Nancy Pelosi and Howard Dean.

Just a thought.

And here are 29 more thoughts on the totally clueless among us. Keep on clickin’!

“Stupidity often saves a man from going mad.”
(Oliver Wendell Holmes)

“Hey Ollie! It’s too bad that bit of advice came too late for Harry Belefonte.
(Me)

************************************************************************************

Since I stiffed Kender last week by failing to include his entry, the mad Scotsman gets top billing this week. Here my blogbud takes the left to task for their complaints about not finding WMD in Iraq.

Josh Cohen gives Ford Motor Company what for regarding their credit policies among other things. As if the cluebats don’t have enough problems…

Good to see Van Helsing in the Carnival again! This time, the slayer goes after Jimmy Carter for his weasel words regarding “so-called terrorists.” Understandable since he was a “so-called President.”

Cao has a literate piece about the granddaughter of the Atomic Traitors, the Rosenbergs, suing the NSA for spying. Man…she’s ugly as well as being dumb.

Bill Teach is keeping an eye on the tin foil hat wearing Congressman John Conyers who has reconvened his 3 ring conspiracy circus in the basement of a House office building.

Those pinata pounding pachyderms at Elephants in Academia are going after foreign cluebat Hugo Chavez and his plans for private companies who do business in Venezuela. Must read.

Adam Graham has an interesting look at abortion and how it has impacted the Democratic party.

Our Carnival’s fearless Finn (who resides in Canada) from Sixteen Volts has a great article about the left’s fascination with pseudo scientific pursuits like homeopathy and other “alternative” medicines.

Jay Stephenson has the goods on the judge who gave a teacher/rapist a suspended sentence despite a lot of evidence that pointed to this cluebat doing serious time.

Here’s our Carnival satire section for those who like their politics funny and thought provoking:

Our favorite hippie chick Peace Moonbeam visits Argentina for some cosmetic surgery. I couldn’t stop laughing.

Buckley F. Williams has a hilarious piece on Ray Nagin’s racism.

Bloggoddess Pamela doesn’t need plastic surgery but she hits a home run with this bit about the two cows that I guarantee will have you ROTFLYAO.

Mr. Right has the real story about how sunspots blocked Karl Rove’s mind control ray briefly last week.

“I’ll publish, right or wrong: / Fools are my theme, let satire be my song.” - Lord Byron.

Palmetto Pundit has a Ted Kennedy piece that shows why maybe the Senator from Cuckoo Land should start taking Alzheimer’s medication.

Jimmie K. is feeling sorry for the people of Washington state because they have to put up with one of the most clueless Senators around, Pat Murray.

The lovely Mensa Barbie has some ideas on how to deal with the clueless countries who are hindering us from prosecuting the War on Terror to its fullest.

Tom Bowler has the skinny on the link-up between Kerry and Kos and what it might mean for the Democratic party.

Jack Cluth writes about the poetry lesson given to us by al Qaeda’s #2 Ayman al-Zawahiri. Maybe there is a limerick in their somewhere…

Common Folk Using Common Sense has a jaw dropping piece about Atlanta’s mayor complaining about the disappearing ghetto.

As usual, Don Surber comes through with an uproarious bit of cluelessness on the part of local bureaucrats who this time abused a state program by using a benefit for a different purpose than intended.

DL at TMH Bacon Bits outlines the stare decisis argument on aborton and skewers Michael Kinsey for his ignorance.

Bill Karl has a good analysis of the impact the Alito hearings will have on the Democrats.

Is there anyone more clueless on the planet than President Ahmadinejad of Iran? Orac doesn’t think so and shows us why.

Mark Coffey has “lost his bananas” over Harry Belefonte’s stupidity and comes up with the best comeback I’ve seen in a while to the Bushitler crowd: “the mere fact that people within a state can call it fascist and totalitarian is the best proof that it is no such thing…”

AJ Strata wants an intervention for Democrats who seem to be following the far left off of a cliff.

Fred Fry has some thoughts about the cluelessness of people who constantly say that Islam has been “hijacked.”

XYBA writes about the sad cluelessness of a father for what his son became - American Taliban John Lindh’s father begging for clemency for his traitorous offspring.

How litigious of a society have we become? Wonder Woman highlights parents who evidently can’t say no to their children when it comes to breakfast cereal.

Finally, here’s my piece on Cluebat of the Week William Rivers Pitt’s “Walk out” idea for next week’s SOTU speech.

20 Comments

  1. Jimmy Carter Praises Hamas “So-Called Terrorists”

    Jimmy Carter — the personification of moonbattery, whom even the Clinton Administration regarded as a “treasonous prick” — is at it again, reminding us all how supremely lucky we are to have survived four years of this evil clown in…

    Trackback by Moonbattery — 1/24/2006 @ 3:21 pm

  2. There is never a shortage of stupidity…

    Bask in the clueless. Be at one, with the clueless…and don’t forget to wash up, when you’re done ; )

    Trackback by A North American Patriot — 1/24/2006 @ 3:47 pm

  3. Great carny as always, Ricardo. (Wha, did Kender pouch out his lower lip as he does so well? Heh)

    BTW, DL wrote that Kinsley fisking, did I mention that? [think I did :D ] This is becoming a running joke, ain’t it? Or, are you rubbing it in that I never write any of our carny submissions anymore? I never freakin’ have time to write anything anymore on my own freakin’ blog. Anything good, that is. I think I’m gonna just freakin’ roll up my towel and throw in my keyboard, for all the freakin’ writin’ I can do anymore. And you, mocking me as well. Thanks a lot, Rick. :-P

    If in a month I’ve actually hired additional help at work, then, why, I’ll be like this again:

    *type* *type* *type*

    and you and the rest of the freakin’ b’sphere won’t be able to make fun of me anymore for not writing on my own freakin’ blog.

    /RANT

    :D

    Comment by The MaryHunter — 1/24/2006 @ 4:11 pm

  4. Q: Who would want to see “Brokeback Mountain”?

    A: Women, homosexuals.
    *Yes, you knew this*

    Q: Who in their right mind would spend 2(?) hours sitting in front of their tv watching an awards show?

    A: Women, homosexuals.
    *See where I’m going with this?*

    Comment by joli — 1/24/2006 @ 5:17 pm

  5. Kinsley Is Not Infallible on Stare Decisis

    Stare decisis is not infallible, just stubborn in allowing change. It is hardly in the category of unchangeable, immutable doctrine, defined as such by the church with the assurances of God.

    Trackback by TMH's Bacon Bits — 1/24/2006 @ 5:41 pm

  6. Americn Taliban’s Father Defends Son

    Frank Lindh, as clue less now as he was before 911. Lindh’s father, Frank, a San Rafael resident, spoke Thursday at the Commonwealth Club of California about the plight of his son, dubbed the “American Taliban,” who was captured while…

    Trackback by Religion of Peace? One-Stop Shopping For War on Terror News — 1/24/2006 @ 5:47 pm

  7. Carnival of the Clueless #30

    The Carnival of the Clueless is up at Right Wing Nut House. Go there now, Come back here later! I’m off to my son’s school for Family Enrichment Night, but will be back later.

    Trackback by Palmetto Pundit — 1/24/2006 @ 6:10 pm

  8. Rick,

    Tried to TrackBack, but it failed. I did add a Post on my blog to send readers over, but for some reason I haven’t been able to send you a trackback for quite a while now. Great carnival, as usual!

    Comment by Palmetto Pundit — 1/24/2006 @ 6:13 pm

  9. 30th Carnival of the Clueless is UP!

    It’s UP!

    Trackback by Cao's Blog — 1/24/2006 @ 7:05 pm

  10. Best. Posts. Ever. Tuesday.

    Right Wing Nut House hosts the Carnival of the Clueless.

    Trackback by Don Surber — 1/24/2006 @ 8:21 pm

  11. Carnival of the Clueless

    Rick Moran has his Carnival going over at Rightwing Nuthouse. It’s the Carnival of the Clueless, featuring this weeks treasure trove of moonbats, idiots, and morons.

    Trackback by Libertarian Leanings — 1/24/2006 @ 8:48 pm

  12. Don’t discount that the dim-wits may walk out. After the past couple of weeks they can’t possibly make bigger jackasses of themselves no matter what they do. I don’t know about other area’s of the country but in my area there is not one person that will stand up for the ‘drunkard’ or any other members of the judicial panel that made fools of themselves. The will shake their head and say how pitiful it was, and this is life long democrats. The drunkard and his pals are the butt of thousands of new jokes, and that is their total accomplishment for two weeks of stupidity in action. Someone in a white coat bring one of those coats with lots of buckles and take the drunk away before he destroy the state of Ma.

    Comment by scrapiron — 1/24/2006 @ 9:17 pm

  13. What the Liberal Media REALLY Doesn’t Want You to

    people don’t understand STRATEGY

    Trackback by Kenders' Musings — 1/24/2006 @ 9:26 pm

  14. [...] for Being Without You…

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  15. The Youngm The Restless, The Libertarinas

    HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL………..the nations first Libertarian student newspaper (hOO ah), The Pennsylvania Independent, does a Q A with yours truly here. The lefties on our colleges and universities campuses must be suicidal.The nations first student Li…

    Trackback by Atlas Shrugs — 1/25/2006 @ 12:19 am

  16. Defining the Opposition

    Visit Rick Moran’s, excellent Carnival of the Clueless #30!
    —————-
    Excellent carnival (as always) and truly great posts. .. Thank you so much!

    Trackback by Mensa Barbie Welcomes You — 1/25/2006 @ 11:47 am

  17. Carnival’s!

    Forgot to cite some of the Carnival’s this week Carnival of the Clueless over at RightWing NutHouse. Another great job by Rick! JimK at Right Thoughts gives us the straight poop for the Bonfire of the Vanities. Both of which

    Trackback by Pirate's Cove — 1/26/2006 @ 9:58 am

  18. Weekly Roundup of Weekly Roundups

    King of Fools hasn’t put together this week’s Carnival of the Carnivals, and quite possibly never will again, but the show must go on: The Bestofme SymphonyThe Blawg ReviewThe Bonfire of the VanitiesThe Carnival of the CapitalistsThe Carnival of the…

    Trackback by Watcher of Weasels — 1/27/2006 @ 1:41 pm

  19. [...] nstallment is called “What Would Jack Baur Do?” I have been remiss so here is last week’s, and the week before that. Three weeks of cluele [...]

    Pingback by The Strata-Sphere » Blog Archive » Carnival Of The Clueless — 1/30/2006 @ 12:24 pm

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