Right Wing Nut House



Filed under: Politics — Rick Moran @ 6:24 pm

As surely as a moth is drawn to  flame and Democrats to bailout money, I am pulled by some unseen force to this website and forced by dint of habit - and out of a desperation born of ennui -  to catalogue my thoughts about the world as it is revealed to me by our new President, Head of State, Commander in Chief, and, we are informed by a doe-eyed, worshipping media, our hero and savior Barack Obama.

The outpouring has been astonishing. About all that’s missing is laying palms in his path as he rode on the back of an ass into Washington. No, Robert Byrd was feeling poorly so he ended up riding in a monstrosity of an automobile nicknamed the “Obamobile” or, more prosaically, Cadillac One.

Now I love Caddies - the older the better. My dad bought a new Cadillac every two years for the last 12 years of his life and let me tell you, it was like riding in the most comfortable bed you’ve ever slept in. Going 90 MPH up US 31 to Michigan, gliding over pot holes as if they weren’t even there, it was like flying in space. You were almost weightless. A doctor could have operated in the back seat so smooth it was.

That was then. Compare this beautiful monster of a Sedan DeVille with the pug-like face of the Obamonstrosity. It almost makes me ashamed to be an American to think what GM has done to the Cadillac. If cars were dogs, we would have euthanized most American autos years ago.

American cars used to be big, smelly, swaggering, get the fu*k out of my way, powerful, unbelievably comfortable, and virtually indestructible machines of glory. So what if they only got 8 miles to the gallon? About 95% of your trips were going to be less than 8 miles anyway so what’s a gallon of gas when you can ride around in a Chariot of the Gods? Then government got into the business of designing cars and the result is what Obama is forced to ride around in - something that looks like a French interior designer with a taste for cubist art might come up with.

I remember when the first Toyatas started to appear on the roads. It was like frightening - for the person driving the American car. You were afraid to pass the little Celicas on the highway for fear of blowing them into a ditch. In the city, pulling up to one of those tin death traps at a stop light was to elicit a sneer or a giggle. Of course, Toyota has the last laugh today and Detroit is designing cars that look like the old Trabants that belched smokey oil and puttered around the streets in East Germany 20 years ago. Same boxy, useless look about them.

So our hero and savior no doubt wishes he could at least have something really kewl to ride around in but got stuck with a car that can withstand bomb and chemical attacks but lacks any style or elegance whatsoever. What’s a Messiah to do?

It certainly hasn’t stopped the press from piling on the hero worship and granting our new president Hall of Fame status before even throwing his first Major League pitch. Imbuing a politician - even a good one - with superhuman qualities is not a healthy thing in a republic. As this video shows, some even have taken to pledging to be a “servant” to The One. I think supporting Obama is just fine, a truly patriotic thing to do in this crisis to be sure. But I think it is unamerican to kneel in service to anyone - especially a politician and most especially a politician who has only been in office two days.

Two freaking days! Already the press is swooning. “HE’S DIFFERENT!” Oh my God, he’s working in his SHIRTSLEEVES in the Oval Office! He’s already “overturned the entire architecture of the Bush Torture Regime.” Democracy has been restored! Good has triumphed over evil!

Meanwhile, his tax dodging Treausry Secretary (Turbo Tax has denied he could have possibly missed not paying the taxes he owed) is elevated to the status of Wizard. He is Gandolf the Green, Holy Arbiter of the Sacred Scrolls of Bernanke, High Priest of the Bailout. Depending on which genuflecting senator you talk to, he is either “irreplaceable,” or “uniquely qualified.”

I don’t care if he’s an alchemist who can turn pork into gold, just give me an honest public servant please. Or are we to use crooks and liars to get us out of this morass? If that’s the case, get me Michael Milkin on the double! Anyone who can sell the crappy paper he ended up dumping on the unsuspecting rich twits on Wall Street is the kind of guy we need running this bailout thingy. I bet he has the economy humming along in no time.

Glad to see Hillary made it. I would send her first to Russia. There she could respond to the leader of the Liberal Democratic party in Russia who said that Condi Rice needed sex - badly. The reason for our Secretary of State’s “anti Russian statements” were because she was a single woman and hadn’t had a man in a while.

There is absolutely no doubt that anyone would say something like that about Hillary. First, who would have the nerve? Secondly, we know Bill Clinton and the idea that Hillary is lacking anything in her sex life is ludicrous. So I hope that Hillary makes even tougher anti-Russian statements just to tell of that sexist pig who insulted Condi.

Seriously, it hasn’t been a bad couple of days for Obama - quite good in a couple of respects. But are we to endure 4 or 8 years of this over the top, out of control, masturbatory media overkill? Everything about him his so perfect that any criticism at all seems harsh. Obama doesn’t necessarily invite this sort of thing but it seems to happen anyway. I’m sure we’ll have plenty of time to examine this phenomenon as the months pass and reality sets in.

Until then, I guess we’ve just got to make fun of it whenever we can…


  1. Brent Bozell said the media’s lack or resources will insure that future ivestigative reporting by news outlets will be lacking. Sadly, he’s probably right…along with the media’s new lack of will or identity. They’ve reduced themselves to a bunch of commentators.

    It’s Tiger-Fab-Gear-Beat quality reporting we got these days.

    Comment by P. Aaron — 1/22/2009 @ 6:58 pm

  2. “…hasn’t been a bad couple of days for Obama…” ?!? Did you catch his halted, stuttering, apprehensive, unintelligible performance today while briefing the press on the Exec Order to close Gitmo? He even had to turn to his counsel and ask what other EOs were in store for tomorrow. He gave the clear impression to me of someone who knew not what the heck he was doing - not so good, I think, for the sacred image of Obama the Eloquent.

    Comment by The MaryHunter — 1/22/2009 @ 7:32 pm

  3. What the Dinosaur, Drive-By, Mainstream, Obama-Worshiping Media is having is an Obamalaculation. I hope that they have enought towels to clean themselves!

    Comment by Mark J. Goluskin — 1/22/2009 @ 7:53 pm

  4. You’re so funny when you’re angry. So please stay angry.

    Comment by CZ — 1/22/2009 @ 8:15 pm

  5. Fear not; Joe (The Mouth) Biden will keep the media in plenty to talk about while they ignore that the new administration is finally taking us down that dusty road to socialism. It will be the only time the media will have not wearing their kneepads kneeling at the feet of “The One”.

    It will be fun to watch as “The One” signs the bill into law that Nazi Pelosi has forced through Congress deciding which of us are worthy of a “bailout” and which of us have to pay for it. But don’t worry, the drive to make us a “new” more equitable society will not apply to the NBA. Have no fear that we will finally see some 5′2″ inch Native American woman playing for the San Antonio Spurs. After all, you can take this equity thing just so far and some things are sacrosanct.

    Rick says it has been a couple of “quite good” days for Obama.
    I am sure that Obama has the problem of where to put the Gitmo prisoners already worked out. William Ayers and Bernadette Dohrn’s children are grown so we can assume they have at least two bedrooms empty. If the terrorists are willing to double up, that takes care of four. I wonder how “White Rabbit” will sound in Arabic.

    Then there is always Rashid Khalidi’s place and Louis Farrakhan has some nice digs. And they are sure to have a few spare Qur’an laying around so that eliminates that budget expense. Now we are getting somewhere. Only about 240 to go.

    And while we are at it; how about that funding to organizations in other nations for abortions. Hell, if we are going to kill off our next generation, they need to level the playing field by killing off theirs. We don’t really need the money dumped into our economy anyway. In 12 months, everyone will have a job. Except those who are drawing welfare. They already have a job rounding up voters for the Democrats. What do they call that? Oh, wait, it’s coming to me. Oh, yeah, ACORN.

    Ricks whole entry is quite funny, really. He assumes that the media is still alive and well, albeit on their knees. Me, I think they have entered the Night Of The Living Dead just about 18 months ago.

    Comment by retire05 — 1/22/2009 @ 8:17 pm

  6. To be slightly fair to GM, the Presidential limo bears about as much resemblance to a production vehicle as a NASCAR race car does. Of course, the civilian Caddys don’t look much better.

    Comment by steveegg — 1/22/2009 @ 8:46 pm

  7. Enjoyed the read. Agree on Cadillac. Wondering when Gitmo guests will be walking our streets. Planning entry in next inaugral poem contest. Or not.

    Comment by mark30339 — 1/22/2009 @ 9:09 pm

  8. The thing I find most annoying about Obama and the media is the fact that when a republican was in office dissent was considered patriotic but now that Obama is in office dissent is just called whining, complaining or racist. How is it patriotic for one and not the other?

    Comment by Joshua — 1/22/2009 @ 10:03 pm

  9. Calm down dude, this is just the press exalting out loud. A certain amount of this is to be expected with any new president, but with his celebrity persona and charming family (and boredom of 8 Bush years), Obama is getting praise from the MSM even if he just says “hello”. It will change to more balanced coverage by the end of the year, wait and see.

    Comment by Surabaya Stew — 1/22/2009 @ 10:15 pm

  10. Dude, it’s right there in Nostradamus:

    The shirtsleeved one of mighty ears
    Astride a hideous indestructible beast
    Shall failed mortgages repair aaaaaaaand be a favorite among the nations
    Before and after the elephant shall bellow in pain.

    It’s pretty clear if you know how to read it.

    Comment by michael reynolds — 1/22/2009 @ 10:49 pm

  11. Puppet on a string?

    Comment by mannning — 1/22/2009 @ 10:53 pm

  12. Imbuing a politician – even a good one – with superhuman qualities is not a healthy thing in a republic.

    Wow - this is a Bush person saying this? That’s rich. You want to know what’s even less healthy for a Republic? Imbuing BAD politicians with superhuman qualities. You live in a glass house.

    Additionally, lighten up. We just got through one of the most terrible Presidents this country will ever see, and are now tasked with cleaning up much of his mess. Maybe if your party could produce some half-way decent candidates, we wouldn’t celebrate like we’re being liberated after they leave?

    Bush’s approval ratings are as much a factor in the intensity of the celebration as anything.

    Comment by Levi — 1/22/2009 @ 10:54 pm

  13. Rush was awesome today,

    “LIMBAUGH: What I’m afraid of is that what Obama did with this executive order is actually make it easier for the media to go get Bush documents. ”

    I love the idea of the government fearing public scrutiny.

    Heh - me too. And opening the presidential documents will at the very least make the politicians more careful. Whether it will stop any wrongdoing, we’ll have to see.


    Comment by Chuck Tucson — 1/23/2009 @ 3:39 am

  14. Is Michael Reynolds reading one of Elizabeth Alexander’s poems? It’s not Nostradamus, I’m sure of it.

    Those libs lie about everything and think they can get away with it. What Nostradamus said about Obama is referred to in Century 8, 10:

    “A great stench will come from Lausanne, but they will not know its origin, from where they mold spears or dance the hula, and some will say it’s perfume.”

    Comment by sara in va — 1/23/2009 @ 9:30 am

  15. There remains the chance the media will consciously hit harder on Obama in order to retain limited credibility. Given how he stiffed the NYT on their “traditional” pre-inaugural interview, I am not surprised they responded by dampening the enthusiasm for following through with Bush, Gates & Obama’s Gitmo policy end.


    Comment by Eddie — 1/23/2009 @ 10:35 am

  16. The most important question to ask is… do you really think Bill is porking Hill? I can’t know, but methinks that act came to a halt about 29 years ago. Just wonderin’.

    Comment by lionheart — 1/23/2009 @ 1:29 pm

  17. How could Obama have two good days when he hasn’t actually done anything yet? In the snippets I’ve seen he looks overwhelmed, and who wouldn’t be. Nobody is ready to be President coming out of the blocks and with Obama’s lack of experience the learning curve will be a steep one.

    If treading water equals a good day what’s a bad day going to look like?

    Comment by EBJ — 1/23/2009 @ 3:20 pm

  18. How could Obama have two good days when he hasn’t actually done anything yet?

    He’s actually done quite a bit.

    Comment by Chuck Tucson — 1/23/2009 @ 4:57 pm

  19. Sat morning/Fri evening links…

    I am heading to Killington for a weekend of skiing and general merriment in the snow and cold, and leaving these droppings behind.
    Yo Yo and Itzhak faked it? Sheesh. Just like Milli Vanilli. Would have thought it beneath their dignity.
    How to get yo…

    Trackback by Maggie's Farm — 1/23/2009 @ 6:47 pm

  20. Obama doesn’t invite this sort of thing? Have you seen what happens to “news people” who don’t do the hero worship thing and gasp, ask a hard question? Fox News was shut off for a while after the election for daring to do what our news people are supposed to do. Good luck to anyone working for Politico on the White House beat, you’ll be lucky to get acknowledged for another year without some world class ass kissing.

    Comment by Dirk — 1/23/2009 @ 9:28 pm

  21. When I saw the new Impalas I wept. Want to make smaller cars? Fine — but don’t name them after the lead sleds. Its disrespectful.

    Of course, that could just be because I miss my my 96 SS. I loved that beast. Especially when some kid in a Yugo with underbody lights would rev at me at a light, not knowing there was an LT1 under the hood. Ah, memories.

    Comment by busboy33 — 1/24/2009 @ 6:45 pm

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